Reply To: No spark in Marriage



Dear friend,

The gravity of your situation is undeniable. I do see this taking severe turns in the long run.

The way you have explained your problem, actually is more than enough for me, to answer all questions I thought I would ask you for more details. The way you have gone in details, does describes the pain of helplessness , you are going through.

Here is my take.

    Please DO NOT any point of time consider this as a casual statement

, made by an anonymous member, who is virtually not liable for anything.

I have seen many such cases before, and in 9 out of 10 such cases (lack of interest, commitment and ‘engagement in relationship’), are the result of purely non commitment.

The reason ? Is usually see only one. Hold your breath – since this is an arranged marriage, very highly likely she has relationships from past, and they continue till now. It is very disheartening and fearful to even read this, but go on, find the truth first. Your is a very simple case, where you have done anything and everything in terms of pampering her. The only reason she could still behave like non commited and non engaged in a relatinship is her commitments and promises somewhere else. Although on her part too, this is impractical and bring her a lot of pain in years to come, but my friend, for you this can go on for years.

What is the way out ? The more complicated the problem, the simpler the solution. Do not talk or ask her about what I have typed above, dont even give her clue about the considerations you are going to make about her past relationships. Just dig deep – pull her all phone records, find if she has other sim cards, find her email addresses, do everything to track number of calls / sms made to particular number which is not know to you, dont rely on any info she gives u about such numbers.

While this effort above can be very discouraging, given the heart and soul you have given to sustain this relationship. but trust me my friend, the sooner you find this out, less the pain.

My humble request to you again, to not take thi lightly. I have in personal life seen many such cases, and the outcome was shock and disbelief.

I do personally wish you a happy life. I am right here if you do feel like talking more about it