#15327

BeingPositive
Participant

Hi abhicrik,

When you accept something, you need to accept it fully, no matter what. When I say that you should accept eye-blinking, I mean that you need to accept that as a ‘present reality’ even though it goes on and on for some time. You must accept it without any conditions. After all, it will take some time for any changes to take place.

Say to yourself:

“Even though it goes on and on, I accept it fully because there is nothing else that I can really do about it. I cannot stop it directly or forcefully.

In fact, if I apply force and try to stop it, it becomes even worse and makes me feel even more fearful, anxious and self-conscious. And these negative emotions and self-consciousness only brings more eye-blinking. And that makes me feel hopeless and frustrated about the whole thing. So what is the point in struggling and fighting with it?

It will be like trying to defeat my own left and with my right hand! Who is going to win? It is like fighting with my own self. The habit is currently a part of me and I cannot just stop it by force. So therefore, I accept this current condition and just go with it.”

Accepting something doesn’t mean that you don’t want to improve. It simply means that you understand that you cannot improve by force or effort. You cannot improve or stop a habit directly. Acceptance is really an indirect way of letting go of a habitual pattern.

What acceptance does is that it relieves you of the obsession and relaxes you. You will stop fighting with the habit and feel more ok and at ease with it.

It is not some kind of a sin to blink your own eyes! Is it? What’s so bad about it? People have a lot more harmful and dangerous habits – habits that are dangerous not just for themselves but even for others! In comparison, your eye-blinking habit is pretty harmless, isn’t it?

The more you fear and worry about your eye-blinking and the more you will try to control or monitor your habit, the more your attention will keep going to it and the more your eye-blinking will continue. That’s what I mean when I said that it becomes an obsession and a vicious cycle.

The only way to break that cycle is to simply accept it fully and let it happen as much as it does. Don’t worry about it too much. Just ignore it as much as you can and focus your attention and energy towards other positive aspects of your life and personality. Focus on enjoying many other interesting things and activities in life and don’t give too much importance to a harmless habit……

It feeds on your own excessive attention to it. Your own focus on it gives it energy. And you have the choice whether to keep giving energy to your habit by focusing and trying to control it, monitoring and fighting with it or not.

As you will be able to ignore it and accept it more, and will focus your attention more on other interesting things in your life, it will slowly lose it’s stronghold on your mind and will become less and less powerful. It will slowly disappear and will die it’s own death in due time…..without any effort.

Hope this helps you. :)