October 30, 2014 at 4:08 pm #13873
ok so the story is i studied in the gulf till 1oth and then did 11th and 12th here which is when i started sufferin from depression cuz the people here are so diff plus the change of syllabus. i thought of suicide as a way out becuz i couldn’t handle the pain.but i told my cousin and she told my parents and my dad talked to me about it but he couldnt understand it but that helped in a way.now im in college first year and i had a different picture in my head.that we would have more freedom that we wouldnt have classes everyday but we do and its from 9-5 which comepltly exhausts me,and u require a 75% attendance but i … its was just hard goin to college ,not cuz the subjests werent interesting ,i just couldnt i dont know why if it was laziness i just didnt want to plus the students there are so diff from me.and now becuz i dont have 75% attendance the teacher is sayin he might bar me from answerin the semester exams and i am freakin out becuz i would waste a whole year and if i my parents find out they will kill me becuz i am the only boy in the house and they expect me to carry the family name but i just cant study cant conc, in the gulf i had better friends .. and my % was 82% in the 12th it was 62%.i need help but dont know where to get it from . i dont know wat i will do if i cant answer the exam and if my parents find out , the old thoughts of suicide cant help screamin out , im just so tired of everythin and i go to sleep everyday prayin for god to kill me , becuz i dont understand why he would give this good life where i have everythin i want when there are children starving out there and there could do so much that me in there in my shoes , live a better life , make my parents happier ,not be so lazy as me ….in the 11th i read up about depression ways to combat it , it helped a lil i just dont know wat to do now , i have no control anymore , the only control i feel like i have is to kill myself and just end the pain ….theres this online game dota 2 , thats the only thing i do from now on cuz its only thin i feel like , i play online with friends from my 10th .when i play it i feel like i have control of something .and now i cant stop . but i need to study , semester exams is a month away and i need 60% and above to get a good job but if i cant answer the semester exams im am truly screwed .sorry for the long read, hope u can…October 30, 2014 at 4:47 pm #15617
hay friend our country is not so horrible but there r only some colleges are like only..
So your problem is definitely you don’t have any friends in your class so your first step should make friends in your class. Then you telling that you have 62% it is not bad because so many struggles to get this marks and u should know one thing percentage will not decided who you are it only defines your position in your class so please don’t thought any negative roots be confident in your self and you can msg me if u hav any problem…
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