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    AKANKSHA
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    sir , i have been facing depression since last two yaers..my heatlh and studies are hampered.i have also taken depression tablets fr dis..i just broke up with a muslim guy. we had relatinship sice 2010 october…from the first day i feel i have been into a abusive and lusty relationship. he alwys wanted me to do sex or wanted to get physical only. he was less intrested in my life or other concerns of my life and he hated being into normal conversations between us. i always wanted to discuss marriage and wanted my raeltionship to be futuristic. i always said either we should brek up or decide upon marriage. till one n half yaer he dint respond serusliy to marriage decision so i wanted to break up bt he nvr let me do so in some or the other way he dint let me go. after a year and so i finaly asked him abt marriage n he said no he cant marry me. so i jst decided to break up and we broke up. in that one yaer time he alwys insisted me to do sex on skype or show my body parts to him. and he use to use very dirty sex language always even on phone or mesages and always forced me to show my body parts to him on skype and to get rude.i had to forcrefully do dis also sir on skype..i use to cry fr dis.. whwnver i use to meet him he was less or laest intrested in talking about our raeltionship or planning for future or marriage and more interested in being physical. i was nt lusty n i wanted love and care . he nvr cared for me . i dat one yaer an incident hapeened he took me to a park which was full of people who wre chaep n wre doing sex only he forced himslef on me and tried to do my rape or i can say it was an atempt to rape bt fortunately people came around so he had to take a backstep. in that attempt he hit me several times and tried to choke me also. and said that he was wd me since a yaer to have sex n I nevr let him do dat. AND SAID TODAY HE “LL DO EVRYTHING..in that atempt to rape when i refused he ended up grabbing me and throwing me down on floor on stones , then laying on top of me and i kept trying to push him off of me as he tried kissing me and holding me down, but he was also dry humping me also…thn finaly i decided to broke up… he use to say show me ur pussy on skype n ass n boobs.. n he use to show his parts tooo.. i use to feel so dirty n use to cry also bt he alwys kept me insisting …becoz of dis i went into deprsiion….i use to say i will brek up wd u if u will do all dese thingss..thn he use to laugh at dis that i can nvr brek up wd him..pls tell me was i wnrg anyhere??n used dirty abusive language. after dat incident i decided to broke up wd dat guy. bt again he dint let me do dat…he alwys used to touch me or wanted to get intimate in front of others or nywhre he used to touch my private parts also which i dint like and alwwys opposed that, doe to all dis i went into sever depression . also he took some of my pictures forcefuly. in that yaer or so. i found him having realtionship wd another girl also on facebook. finaly i broke up.. then again after 2 months he contacted me and said srry for everything ie: in march 2012 last march n said he is raedy for court marriage. i came again into raeltionship .in june 2012 again after sometym he started forcing me to get nude on skype n show my body parts..sometimes i had to do dis also.. and he he said he will marry me in this cuming juune 2013. i waited till one yaer and because of this i was into raltionship wd him bt he was very abusive he use to abuse me he nvr respected me . also he use to force me to have sex he use to talk very dirty. i again found him invoved in another girl and she told me she use to sex on skype with my bf .. i found his google search history in which i found he searched for “call girls mobile number”.. when i asked him abt all dis he simply said no that he has nt done this.. and i found this in his gmail history…..luckily i nvr had full sex wid him. he use to show interst whenevr he wantes to talk of sex otherwise he dint want to concentrate on me. same things wree happening again and i found myself again being sexulayy harrased.he agaiin tried to force or atempt of rape wid me second tym. i use to talk of maraige and he was nt dat much intereseed in that he just usesd to say let june cum we “l marry.. bt as aoon as soon march ended he started ignoring me and he himself wanting to let me go n brek up . before that whnever i used to say of brek up he nvr let me go.. i wanted to brek up coz i found him lusty nd i felt he dont love me a all n he jst loves my body.. alll these things became very complcated nd we used to fight daily … he used to abuse me on every single topic.. finaly we broke up 2 monts before after dat he dint call me now…is it love ??? did he love me ?? having me nude on skype …. all dis left me speechlesss….all dis gives me dpresion ..pls help.i know its gud fr me bt i dnt know y i miss him and feel bad about watever phyiscal intimacy i had wd him.. cz he use to force me i had to get physical like foreplay etc.i nvr liked it bt he forced me.. i have alredy cut all my contacts like skype n phone etc … i dont knw why i miss him. though i knw he wanted sex only.. he is no goood fr me… i became so depresess during dese two yaers he use to torture me and i alwys wanted to brek up wd me he nvr let me do that wenver i use to chnge my number he use to cntct my frends and sayss srryyyy or some kind of emotinal talkss and used to say in this june he”ll marryyy .. the reason he gave me june czz in dis june he was meeting the age of 21 acording to his birth certificate .. his age was lesss in documnts.. his actual age is 23 bt in documnts it was less so he gave me dis june to marry bt as soon as march came i insisted on cuming to court and seek advice to lawyers fr cuming june and court marriage .. i dnt knw he was nt intrested in dat and gave me some or the other resaons .. and he was nt intrested in breking up also… he use to cum back again and again. nd said becoz i love you dats y i cum bck…nd thn finalyyy he broke up 2 months before because he dint find my behavuior proper as there wrere many fights between us daily…i dnt knw i became very insecure over possessive fr him nd he dint like dis behavuoir of mine …i use t o cry everyday he dint use to talk wd me properly and whenver i have taken dis decision of getting seperated he nvr let me go.. his time before two months he got raedy fr final seperation n before a day of seperation he again forced upon me and the nxt very day he left me.. he has donee this several times.. my agree to dis that my beahviour became very rude towardsss him n i could nt gave him respct …becoz of dis fights wree incraesing day by day… bt i dnt knw y i could nt respect him.. i love him bt could nt respct him …i dnt knw y my behaviuor .. i was sick of his activitesss….like sex etc.. no discusion fr marage .. becoz of all dis last yaer i went into severe depresion and went to a cytarist also.. i dnt knw i still mis him and feel bad abt phyiscal intimacy between us..we used to fight becoz i want other aspects of our relationship to get discussed and i wanted him to get seruis fr marriage he wnted his life to live his qwn way like he hated being into conversations over phone …bt yes whenver it cumes to sex talks he can talk wd me fr hours over phone..what ws dis how would i feel fr dis??? i felt like a dustbin…i knw.. we wre hindu muslims so it was really tough to get married when our socitey doesnt allow dese kind of marriages.. dats y i was planing fr court marriage n even i told him i can get converted to islam and he can marry me.. bt he kept me confusing over dis all throughtout the yaer…he was very indifrent … at last he said he cant marry me becoz of his family… his family would nt accept dis marriage … bt that too over a fight in which he mentined my behavuior is nt gud i m very overpossesive and dominating.. bt actualy i m nt dat kind of person .. i became overposesive becaoz of his activites only.. i nvr wanted him to get in touch wd other girls … i hated it whnever he use to b wd his male frends toooo…i dnt knw y.. he use to ignore me in front of his frendss. he dint liked dis behavuir of mine.. and if his family would have been only resaon thn i was ready to get seperatd 2 yaers bck only bt he dint let me do that in sone or the other way…….his excuses wre difrent evreytime i talk of marrige… 2 months back also he forced me on a day and dat tooo at a public place.. n the next day he finaly broke up wd me saying my behivuir is nt gud.. wht kind of behavuior was he expecting frm me.. i have forgived him so many timess…and was still ready to get married.. i came into relationship again last yaer jst because of his promise fr marriage…otherwise i would have nvr contacted him…he came bck again… he made me menatlly sick…..i knw my behavuior became dominating and over poseesive bt in dese circumastances who wll nt beacome insecure?????? becoz i said no to phyiscal intimacy he left me….i loved him.. agree i couldnt treat him properly bt i guess no girl can resptct a guy like him… i couldnt nvr trust him.. i belive no other girl can do that….pls help me …..he has moved on..he cn becoz he dint love me ( ..he said he wantd to live his life his own way he dint wnt ny disturbances frm me over the phone.. no calss no msgs… he dint wnt to give me time..he dint want that i should stp him frm being frends wd other girls over the phone or facebook.. he dint like i should stp him frm being wd his male frendsss… he dint want i should discuss fr marriage… or insist him to get serusly indulged in marrige discusuion.. in the end he said he cam marry me afteer his sister wl get maried in 2 yaers or so… i agreed to that also.. bt he was nt at all behaving proprely.. he again forced mee at a public plce a day before separation.. the last talk we had was,,, i was telling him thaat my mother is luking fr a guy fr me fr marrige… as soon i told him he dropped the conversation n said he will talk to me after an hour over dis,, 4 hoursss went he he dint respond… thn wen i again called him he ws tension freeee no botherations that my mother is luking fr a guy fr me.. i said u have no tensions fr dis… u dint feel insecure over dis… n he said i dnt wnt to b wd u… i cannot live wd u dis way.. u cannot dominate me.. u live ur own life … since thn 2 months have gone he dint contct me at all….. dese wre all issues btwwennn us …

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