January 26, 2014 at 1:24 pm #13578
I got married four years back and at that time, I was studying. Now I am near to completion of my studies. My husband used to come once in a month to meet in first two years of my marriage and afterwards he got transferred to some far place from mine. From the beginning of our marriage, he had some misconceptions that I am a terrorist in his family. Even he has the concepts that any girl after marriage does not want to care for parents, and wont take the whole family together. His own mother and sister didnt stay much with their in laws. Even his sister stayed for only one 1and half yr, and from last five years she didnt visit even single time her in laws. But my husband says that she has sacrificed alot in past 9 yrs, I dont know what. So, he always blame me for the things, which I have never done. Even last month his mother got operated and I am the person who is taking care of her. He never came to meet me in my place after he got transferred. And now he wants me to stay alone with his parents until he got transferred back or switch the job. I am 30 now and want to have baby as soon as possible.We can meet only after 3-4 months and for 2-3 days,and he says that dont worry it will happen. How? he only knows. Even we dont have very good understanding and I dont know much about him. Our relation is not growing at all. I never stayed with him more than 10 days and that is also only 2-3 times. And his misconceptions and blames hurt me alot. He says he doesnt need me and his parents also support him and they also want me to stay alone with them. I want that his parents to come with us and we all stay together. But I dont know, why they want me to stay alone? Its already 4 years and we dont have child also, even no hope in the relation. Although we have only these two issues left, one staying and the other one his nonsense blames. His mother always support him saying that only the girl has to adjust and creates confusion also may times. None of them understand my feelings, my need,my desires. I am very much frustrated from all this. I am with in laws from last 4.5 months and now I am loosing patience. In the present time, nobody stays even that much. But somehow I am passing the time, but now it has become unbearable.My career has also lost the direction, being highly educated I want to do job soon. My all dreams are getting ruined. He has all affection for his parents, what about me? Nothing. My parents are also very much worried,they are planning to talk next month about this. But I am afraid that what will happen? Even my sister-in-law got transferred once, that time my mother-in-law said husband n wife should stay together. But for me her thinking is different, I am also somebody’s daughter, somebody’s wife. But they dont think about me.I am afraid that why he has no affection for me? I know we didnt stay much,but my other friends are also staying away from their husband. But their husband want to see them soon, but here my husband being a robot, a shravankumar only cares about his parents. He has nothing to do with me, I am like a machine for him. Please help me to come out of this situation, I dont know his intentions, why he doesnt want to stay? I dont feel to talk to him and thinking of stop talking to him as well as I want to close every relation with him temporarily. Sometime I think that I should have married his parents rather him, why me god? I wanted a normal husband not very rich, not so handsome, had very few wishes. He should love and care me, even if I got ill he doesnt care. And if his parents got loose motion also, it became a big issue and he ask me to take care of them. Sometimes I wished to god please call me, why for me there is no love? why me? But he doesnt listen.And when I tell my problems to my parents, my husband got angry. So, to whom should I share my problems? I dont know when the darkness of my life will disappear and new light of hope will enter. I miss my happiness before marriage, he always fought with me on nonsense things, which I am assumed to be doing in future. Bad treatement of his parents, not caring them, why he has this mentality, I dont know. I am doing everything, his relatives appreciate me, but he can never see. He always think that somebody else is taking care of his mother perhaps. Please help me to come out of these difficult circumstances and I feel depressed and negative. In a day, everytime it comes on my tounge, why I am alive? I dont want to live life like this, I also want to be happy, smile and feel proud of myself.
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