This topic contains 2 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by Profile photo of zulfia zulfia 2 years, 2 months ago.

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  • #17966
    Profile photo of juno
    juno
    Participant

    hello am 24 🙁 I got married an year back . its an arranged one there is no time to inquire about my husband before marriage. I love him a lot after engagement and imagined lot of dreams how we can spend our rest of life . To my surprise everything was upside down after marriage . He was in an affair with a divorced girl working with him.since after our marriage he touched me 2 or 3 times . he never took me out , he never talked nicely, he never shown kindness.mean while i got a small job to set my career…there after i have to work in office and in home till midnight and sleeps merely 4 hours . he never spent a rupee on me not even a kerchief…but i can see how he spends for his dates with her ,gifts,…everything. he was addicted to her so that he never treated me as a wife. I caught him with proofs . I discussed everything with their parents but instead of solving the problem they are pissing me off for spying on his affairs . Then i came to know that everyone in his house know his affair before marriage itself but don’t have guts to question him (he is very aggressive and a psycho).I can not discuss and hurt my parents by telling that he dumped me !! because i have a younger sister …and if i take divorce means she will not get married (Its a taboo and social stigma). so am patiently waiting for her marriage and staying with my husband and depressed like hell !! I want to get a place in good business school and move away . Am very much depressed and could not concentrate to study for those exams . i want to move away some where ..my pillow became my best friend to cry, to hug , to share. please help me !!

    #17967

    Swarup
    Participant

    Hi sister i can understand ur problem. But don’t loose ur confidence as soon as ur sister marriage is done then u can apply for divorce. When he don’t care u little bit then then there is no meaning in ur relationship. As u have ur knowledge and educated then u should not fear for anything or for anyone. It is ur life live it happily as u want. Don’t be depressed frm life bcz life is short we has to do all the things in it and has to face everything which comes in our life. Always thing that ur husband lost a good wife that he will never gonna get back but u still have a big future where u can live as ur dreams. So be have faith in God and confidence on urself everything will b alright. U still have loving frds and family and we will b with u…

    #17970
    Profile photo of zulfia
    zulfia
    Participant

    Hi Juno,

    You are a brave girl , and an awesome daughter and sister ! keep it up ! your family will be very very proud of you indeed. At the moment the decision you took is a good one , however, please do not be depressed and feel bad about it. The loss is your husbands. The one thing that NOW you have to do is dont lose out on time. whatever has happened , has happened , instead of holding grudges against your husband , try and make peace with him…if you’ll couldnt be husband and wife , you’ll can still be friends , till you file for divorce , I know he has spoilt your life , but still there is a difference between you and him. You are a good human being.
    Start working on yourself , build your career , study further if you have scope , just try to be happy all the time. Start planning for your future and start working towards it.

    All the best

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