In need of Desperate Help

This topic contains 2 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  rookie 4 years, 9 months ago.

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    I am a 23 years old lady. My problem is that I am totally confused about my life right now. Four Years ago I had a very horrible breakup. My ex-boyfriend took my virginity and left me for another girl who was more beautiful then I am.Since then I have been having issues with everything in my life. I have always been of a fuller body but after that breakup I gained weight very gradually due to which I am having various health problems. I couldn’t talk to my family or friends about it as everyone is not that open to the topic of losing your virginity before marriage. I have hidden this secret in my heart for four long years. I am pursuing my Post-Graduation, but due to all the confusions I did not concentrate on my studies and I failed my exams. I got a year down in my second year. I don’t have any interest right now in my career though I decided to pursue it a long time ago. I feel jealous as my friends are moving ahead in their lives and settling their careers. I feel lonely as my friends don’t have time for me. I am a very shy girl. I don’t talk to many people so the friends I have are very dear to me. I don’t want to lose them. I have a constant fear that one day I will lose everyone that is very dear to me. I just don’t know what to do. I cannot talk to my mom as she is very conservative and will not understand my problems. My exams are coming up next week I have not touched my books. Whenever I see my books I feel like burning it. I feel that my life is meaningless. I am useless. My father died five years ago.
    I am the eldest daughter. My mom is struggling for money. I cannot consult anyone as I can’t pay their fees. Please Help me. Please. I want to come out of this confusion. I want to excel in my studies. I want to help my mom. I want to forget that guy who broke my heart. Please give me some advice. Please Help me…Please!!!



    Because you lost your virginity, you cannot die. It is his crime and your mistake (your belief on him)

    Let it go

    You cannot escape from your roles and responsibilities in your personal life and among your family. you must take care of your mother. At least she should see your marriage before her life ends.

    No need of telling this to your future partner and no need of thinking it always. I understand that your mistake will be killing you everyday.

    Realize that it is not your intentional but emotional. Leave it and forget it.

    Suppose anyone guy who is really taking more care of you and willing to marry you, then if you wish tell him about your past.

    Just keep all this useless unpleasant past things. Live in the present. most of the people in this world regret for the past and worrying for the future. Don’t be like that. Live in the present. Set your goals and targets. Just march fast towards your goals.

    At any point of time, don’t think life ends with this. No Never. Always there is a chance and hope.

    Always think “now what should I do?”



    Virginity is just an abstract concept and thin layer of skin. You gave it up in a moment of love and I don’t think it is something to beat breasts about. One can always do that, lament about the past, but it is not a solution. Your current goal is to achieve something in life and that is making through a very good career. Love, marriage everything will happen when it is the right time. Just concentrate on your studies and go forward. Just chill out, listen to some good music, have healthy food and get back to books. It may be difficult to talk to your mom about this if she is too conservative, but you can always try breaching the topic indirectly, if you feel a great urge to talk about it. But again, marriage is not everything. You have a wonderful life to live and it is a one time offer….. So enjoy this life and let bygones be bygones…….

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