- March 18, 2016 at 1:41 pm #19381
Hi I am new to this forum and just joined today….
I want to share the curse of my life here… if someone can understand and suggest something that can provide us reason to survive.
Our marriage is almost 18 years old. We were two different people from different world. Somehow got together. Our orientation, choices and even way of thinking… nothing matched ever… but still we went together with all the due pains just to avoid giving pains to her parents. Because I always believed that her parent should not pay for her stupidity. She has some basic lackings in her personality… As she does not know how to love and why to love. She thinks that being in love is a characterlessness. She never felt crush of love for anybody in life. Though she was good looking and appearing charming. Her parents are very gentle and genuine. She did marriage (at age of 24) because her parent wanted so. After may efforts she engaged in physical relations but just for shake of experience, she got fully satisfied, but never accepted that she enjoyed it. Making relationship with her always been a tough task. Though we have 2 kids, girl (16) and boy(13).
She has a severe attitude problem, though she has a below average IQ and EQ level.
Following points highlights her basic nature:
1.She thinks, she is always right about everything and every time.
2. She thinks whatever experience she has taken in her life is ultimate and no new thoughts and learning is required.
3. She is very rigid about her thoughts like if she thinks that having drink is absolutely wrong.. then she will never listen to anything else about this and she will make the life a mess on this topic.
4. If you gently advice her about something, which you think she should know or practice or use in her life, she will make the entire atmosphere misrable. Like she was earlier using cotton cloths in her monthly cycles, period. I suggested her to us use tampons and brought a pack of it. She never listen to me and utlimately I had to through the same in dust bin. Later during delivery of baby, doctors given the same to her then she started using it. But she never accepted that she was wrong that time…
Lot of incidents are there to tell… But I think, It is sufficient to understand that person.
Being an important part of my family and mother of my kids (she is an average mother), even my kids started to pointing out things to her which I discourage. But they are getting older now and started identify the realties…
All I need is your views/suggestion to go futher with this kind of person. As tolerance is now very difficult, as every day she create mess on very small things which should be taken very easily…
Please give your views/suggestions….
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