This topic contains 4 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by Profile photo of bc1983 bc1983 3 years ago.

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  • #13777
    Profile photo of bc1983
    bc1983
    Participant

    Hi,

    I am married since 5 years.My concern is me n my husbands don communicate quiet often..he is always into his own thoughts n don’t talk much.off late I feel so bad that not sure he is happy with our marriage or not.also,my MIL stays with us.many times it happened that I could not agree with her. .in such scenarios he always supports her n leave me aside..I feel so angry n unhappy.I want to have a harmonious m loving relationship with him.I want to laugh enjoy my life with him but he is always serious.how should I open communication with him.n ask what’s is there in his mind.I feel so stressed out n unhappy because of this.sometimes we live like strangers .please help.

    #15490
    Profile photo of lindsey_sooze
    lindsey_sooze
    Participant

    First of all I suggest you to be calm down. Every person has its own nature. Somebody likes to speak too much on the other hand somebody don’t. So if your husband is not communicating much with you doesn’t mean that you have some problem. In any relation as per my experience, problem arises when people start assuming things like you. How you concluded that he is not talking much with you means he is not happy with marriage?(This statement is big and serious)

    Second thing why many time you are not agree with your mother in law? A lady of your mother’s age has more experience then you of life, so I don’t think that she may be wrong all the time. So please do an introspection. Rather then winning an argument try to win heart.

    My suggestion:
    1)When your husband is in good mood then talk to him and express your feelings and concerns with him politely. Don’t argue with him. In polite talk you can also ask him for reason. If he tells you something which pinches you; still listen it calmly. A good listener is a good winner.
    2)Improve your nature with your mil. Treat her like your mother. Blessings of old people do magic.

    Please let me know your thoughts on this.

    #15491
    Profile photo of bc1983
    bc1983
    Participant

    Yeah u r right.but there r so deep scares in my heart that it might take some time to heal it.due my mil..she always tried to show case to my hubby that she is best n never appreciated me..this has made deep impact on hubby that I don’t do anything thing or cannot do anything.I don like such things.I wonder wat is my foundation of marriage.he had more trust n confidence in her then me.also she keeps trying to put all negatives for me .in his head..so she can be looked as great…

    #15492
    Profile photo of lindsey_sooze
    lindsey_sooze
    Participant

    When a girl come into the life of a son then mothers start feeling insecurity. They may feel that now her boy start giving importance to his wife.May be this is the case. But if you massage the ego of your mother in law then may be she can change her attitude. If this is true what ever you explained about your husband then you should also be act smartly.

    If you argue your mil, try to prove her wrong then I can assure you that all your efforts will go invain. So make sure that you should never argue with her. Try to praise her. When your husband will see your efforts then his attitude will change. Forget about past and do a fresh start.

    #15493
    Profile photo of bc1983
    bc1983
    Participant

    Yeah sure.will do this..

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