This topic contains 3 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  Gayatri 4 years, 6 months ago.

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  • #13305

    Gayatri
    Participant

    My son is diagonised with PDD when he was 3.

    My 10 yr old son is studying in class 4 in I.C.S.E syllabus hence he has enough to study .We never wanted to pressurise him so till date we have not put him in any classes like drawing, karate etc.He is very sincere in his school work and does his H.W everyday without fail.

    I take his studies at home and help him in his academic work.As of now he is good in academics. As the class level goes higher it is obvious that the writing and studies will be slightly more. Nowadays it is difficult to manage time at our disposal since almost 7 hours he is in school and then he needs to do his H.W , hence everyday it is just not possible to devote time for his studies.

    His handwriting is getting worst day by day. When I ask him he says teachers dictates very fast hence I can’t concentrate on the handwriting part which is a valid reason given by him and I understand his situation.

    Yesterday he was crying when I asked him to study for his exams which is due.He says that one or two class friends of his tease him as dull and he says that they seem to be angry with me and hence I don’t want to study and bring good marks otherwise my friends will be jealous and I will lose my friends since they will not like me and they may stop talking to me.

    In another instance since he has a good voice,we thought of putting him to singing classes near our house for which his reaction was I will stop singing completely because If I sing nicely you will put me in classes which I don’t want to go. As parents we have never forced him on anything and nor till date we have put him in any classes and he is aware of this too.
    As a mother I am worried about why is he reacting so negatively most of the times ?

    Can anyone please help me as to how I need to handle this situation tactfully without hurting my son since he is a very sensitive boy.

    Regards

    #15267

    CpyderW
    Keymaster

    dear gaya3.
    your name is very familiar in south India… C its your child and every child is not ready to obey parents words at first.. they always think u that u r forcing him to get away from his world (play)…its very common…In south they use to quote a word “maile maile na iragu poduma” it means maile means peacock.. iragu means feather… poduma means it delivers…so just by saying peacock peacock u cannot get feather..got it.
    so u should not be static. just not always obey what he feels.. at times u must be little harsh (which is very tough for u) and compel him to do. give him 4 candy’s in the place of one.. at the same time be harsh.. u must act as a diplomat at this stage.. only your diplomatic love will make him to forget his disability.. give him surprises.. because he is also watching u when u become too good and bad.. so surprise him automatically he will bounce up… dont worry all kids are directly from god..have faith in him everything will be functional.. take care of him. my sweet hug for him..
    smiles and cheers
    Sreeram.
    if u wish u can call me in 9377889370

    #15273

    Prachi
    Participant

    Dear Gayatri,

    Thank you for talking to us about your son. Children with PDD are very sensitive and unlike what ‘stranger’ suggests, unnecessary harshness in an already frustrating situation may make it worse for him. It is great that he has been able to cope with his schoolwork until now and I appreciate the attitude you have shown so far. Maybe now that he is growing up, he realizes more that he is different from other children and this hurts his feelings. I think you can gradually start to explain to him how he is different but in a sensitive and gentle manner. Can you tell me exactly which disorder on the spectrum has he been diagnosed with? Tell I would be able to give you more precise instructions on what to tell him and how to handle. Also, in which city do you live? Maybe I can find some expert that can help you get through this situation? Would you like that?
    If you’re not comfortable revealing your details here, you can just send me a private message.

    All the best!

    #15276

    Gayatri
    Participant

    Dear Prachi,

    Thanks a lot for the encouraging reply !!

    Regards
    Gayatri

    quote=’prachi’ pid=’450′ dateline=’1363623102′]
    Dear Gayatri,

    Thank you for talking to us about your son. Children with PDD are very sensitive and unlike what ‘stranger’ suggests, unnecessary harshness in an already frustrating situation may make it worse for him. It is great that he has been able to cope with his schoolwork until now and I appreciate the attitude you have shown so far. Maybe now that he is growing up, he realizes more that he is different from other children and this hurts his feelings. I think you can gradually start to explain to him how he is different but in a sensitive and gentle manner. Can you tell me exactly which disorder on the spectrum has he been diagnosed with? Tell I would be able to give you more precise instructions on what to tell him and how to handle. Also, in which city do you live? Maybe I can find some expert that can help you get through this situation? Would you like that?
    If you’re not comfortable revealing your details here, you can just send me a private message.

    All the best!
    [/quote]

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