This topic contains 3 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  zulfia 2 years, 4 months ago.

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  • #17574

    abalkasa
    Participant

    hi, im 35 year old male. married for last 7 years. right now, im going through somewhat neglected phase of of my life.

    To start with my married life is as rocky as it can be. My wife dosent want to understand anything and just keep on stressing to lead luxurious life. financially I am not doing good for last 3-4 Years. and this has become one of our major topic for quarrel. She is educated but dont know why she dosen`t want to understand.

    My relationship with my father and brother is an all time low. recently My father underwent heart surgery and we brothers need to contribute for his treatment. my brothers have accused me of not helping, whereas i had done whatever I could.

    I am really stressed out about my future, since I have a 2 year old daughter and career wise I am not going good.

    Need help…

    #17576

    zulfia
    Participant

    Hi Abalkasa,

    There are times in life when you feel nothing is going right , it is not that actually things are not right , but when one area of life gets effected people tend to spread that effect on other areas as well. It is natural. Since you are facing career and financial difficulties every problem of yours will automatically relate to that. Firstly , start enjoying life , see the aspect which is going extremely well for you and let that bring confidence and happiness in you. e.g your daughter , or any sport which you like , or you friends. Surround yourself with people who will show brighter side of you. With reference to your wife , she must be trying to motivate you into lifting your career and not actually nagging for luxurious life. Probably you need that push which she is giving , see that in a positive way. If career wise you are not doing well, its okay, it happens , work on that , see for a switch or areas where you can improve it from a positive mindset. Start working on it today , I am sure you will see a difference soon.

    #17590

    abalkasa
    Participant

    Hi Zulfia,

    Appreciate your response.

    Yet times I have tried to divert my attention towards my hobbies (which is nothing more than reading books).

    In the past too, I had faced bad things in my life, but it seems like this time I am miserable.

    Since, I am introvert person, I don`t have much of social life. My life revolves around my office and my home. I tried doing something extra but after few days I loose interest and I am back to square one.

    I don`t have much of Friends.The only friends i refer to are my work colleagues. And I am not comfortable sharing my personal life with them.

    Still in dilemma what to do next. I need to know what is the thing, that is messing up my life.

    Yes, My daughter remains biggest solace in this turmoil.

    Thanks!

    #17591

    zulfia
    Participant

    Hi Abalkasa,

    what you need to do is not give much importance to what is messing up your life, coz the more you think about it , the more it will appear larger than life. You have to make an effort to totally remove this toxic effect it is having on you. It is not an overnight process , it will take time and it can be removed only and only if you make an effort. probably take up a distraction where a bit of physical exercise is involved , like jogging or long brisk walking , early morning long walks are very soothing. Also you can start with a bit of breathing exercise which will help to calm you down and assimilate your thought process and help you concentrate. You need to slowly slowly work on yourself and bring your happiness back.

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