Plan on second child

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    I am a women and my age is 41. My first boy is now 8 years old. Earlier we had decided and had a plan of having only one child. My father-in-law expired 2 years back and he had been continuously coming in my dream and cried in my dream that time. My friends and relatives told that he wanted to be born as your child again. So i promised my Kuladeivam and also prayed my father-in-law that he can be born as my child again if he wishes. Now I am 41 and carrying now, but only in intial week. My Doctor told that she can abort it in medicine if i confirm immediately if i do not want 2nd child. But i am feeling bad that i promised my kula deivam and my father-in-law. Healthwise, I do not have any issues except a mild back pain which is under control. I am working and my employer can give me maternity leave which will not be a problem. I also have support to take care of the child. I am worrying about my age, because my husband will be 66 and I will be at 61 when the 2nd child is at the age of 20 and am also unaware and have no idea about the other issues that my occur on having a child at the age of 41. I have to take decision urgently whether to proceed with my 2nd child or not so as to do the immediate action. i and my husbad are totally confused as to what to do. Kindly advise. thanks in advance.


    Hi Siva, having a child at an advanced age certainly poses many challenges and risks. The biggest risk for a child born to a mother who is above 35 is of Down’s syndrome which is a genetic condition associated with specific physical features and intelligence. Besides this, there is certainly the challenge of dealing with your second child’s life when you are in your 60s and he’s on the verge of graduation. I would suggest that whatever decision you take, please take it for practical reasons and not religious or sentimental ones because bringing up a child involves a lot more than just sentiment, which I’m sure you’re well aware since you already have a child. Also, have a good discussion with an experienced gynecologist about the physical risks involved. I wish you all the best!

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