It all started in the 2nd year of engineering when this beautiful, brilliant and talented girl was assigned as my lab partner. First of all I wasn’t quite as fast or sharp as her. Second, I needed time to understand things and execute them while she was all fast and smooth without making any mistakes or whatsoever most of the time. All of which not only deterred me from learning much from our lab assignments but also generated an immense inferiority complex in me. And this continued till the last semester as I couldn’t tell the true story to my lecturers and have them change my lab partner. At a time I was so deeply frustrated that I didn’t want go to the lab because of this. And over the time probably she too started to think that I was a hopeless fool and started to manage/handle me like you do to your kids. I wanted to go as far as I can from her as her simple presence only was enough to make me feel nervous and act stupid.
Now, we are all out of college. And believe it or not, strangely enough now I’m attracted to her and just can’t get her out of my head. Every decision I make in my day to day life makes me feel “oops!! I could have made a better decision” and if it was her then she would have already done it for sure.
I can’t just convince myself that every individual is different and not everyone gets to be an Einstein.